I have been alcohol free for two years today.
One of the best things about journaling on a regular basis is that I can look back and see the woman that I was. How did I come to that decision? It’s all there. I hadn’t hit rock bottom. There wasn’t a big drunken argument with my husband. I just decided after a weekend of too much alcohol while moving into my little home in the high desert, that enough was enough.
I had been sober curious for a couple of years before that. There was this nagging feeling that in order for me to continue growing, I had to treat myself and my body better. Alcohol is without a doubt a toxin and I was willingly disrespecting myself for short term fun. Plus, belonging to five wine clubs was a tad excessive, not to mention expensive.
So I asked myself, “How good can it get if I just… stopped.
It wasn’t easy. Alcohol is pervasive and a major part of our culture. Every get together included alcohol. Entire experiences were couched in “Where should we go for pre-event cocktails?” “What wine would go with that particular meal?” Even the healthy outdoor activities I loved so much began or ended with a drink. After all, what better way to end a ten-mile hike than with burgers and beer?
But I did it. I had no idea that I was operating most of the time with a very low level hangover from that glass of wine the night before until it was no longer part of my routine. That beer was interfering with my sleep. That my mornings were better without drinking the night before. Now, two years later, I can say without a doubt that it was one of the best things I have ever done for myself.
How much better could it get? So. Much. Better. Exponentially better. To be fair, I moved, changed careers and returned to school during that time, but I have no doubt that leaving alcohol behind accelerated my personal and spiritual growth, as well as my physical health. Even though I’ve had some health setbacks in the past few months, I am stronger and more resilient than I have ever been. Quite simply, everything is better without alcohol.
So I raise glass of sparkling water to my younger self, thanking her for her foresight and sticktoitiveness. You go girl!
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